IT IS FINISHED!!!

Well, at least I got my English paper completed. That's a load off my back. Now I only have a 4 page Bible paper to write, and I'm practically done! The rest of my finals (Discrete Math, Calculus, and Computer Science I) should all be easy, so I'll be able to write that last paper after I take the Discrete Exam tomorrow morning, study some for CS and Calc, and I will be done! Then I'll be able to talk, for those of you who were wondering why I'm not on aim or myspace, I'm not mad at you, I'm just cramming.

Settling in for the long run.

Well, I've come to settle things, or at least things are being settled, wether I want them to or not. You see, I've been talking with women, and that can sometimes get confusing, especially when one or more of them like you. (What a tough situation for a nice guy...) Anyway, my relationships have been a little rocky lately, which has been mostly my fault, but it's all a long story. (Don't worry, I'll get around to it eventually...) So I've been talking with these three really cool girls (I'm not sure if I've mentioned their names as of yet, so they shall remain nameless...) Girl #1 I've known for a long time, and have set my heart upon. Girl #2 I met at camp, and she's liked me ever since. And Girl #3 is really awesome, though we've never actually met face to face, we've talked about tons of stuff and she liked me a lot, and I her for a while, but that's been discussed, and we're still really good friends. (It's a whole lot more complicated and drawn out than that, but that's the condensed version...)
So my relationship with Girl #3 has been settled and we're really firm, my relationship with Girl #2 has been touch and go, unfortunately I've been leading her on when I didn't really mean to, and now I'm going to have to break her heart by telling her that we should be just friends, because I really want to go out with Girl #1, who I have loved for a long time. And it's not just that mushy/horny love/lust either, I genuinely would give my life for hers in a heartbeat. Not that I wouldn't for any of my friends, but she holds a special place in my heart (which sounds cheezy... but I'll just leave it there.) I really should finish this post, but I need to go to a meeting, so I'll probably get back to it later, after homework... oh well.

Exegesis Killed my Motivation

Remember that huge paper I had to turn in a while ago? I might not have mentioned it, but there was a huge paper that we had to turn in for Bible, it was basically our midterm exam. Anyway, since our teacher is the self-acclaimed WSG (World's Glowest Grader), we finally got our papers back today, and I did fairly well. I failed it. Now, before you gasp in shock and horror (which you probably have already done...), let me explain.
So I did well, I could have expanded on a few points here, done some more research there, left out that unrelated quote in that paragraph, and ran that darn spell checker one more time before I turned it in. Of course, this (plus some other things I could have done better on) is all fine and good, leading to my fair grade of 78 (117/150). Well, when I turned it in, I forgot an outline and works cited, a total of 10 points. "Ouch, better put those in before I actually turn it in, and since I also forgot to print two copies, I'll just turn it in later today, no problem." One thing I forgot to look over because I was getting it in under the wire anyway (it was due at the beginning of class and I was five minutes late because I had to print it in the labs...) was that he takes of twenty percent for work turned in late. You read that right, TWENTY PERCENT! Not just twenty points, but a full two letter grades! So my decent (passing) grade of 78, a high C, has turned into a dismal failing grade of 58...
Almost a D, but not quite. Well, that surprised me, and angered me... But after checking the Syllabus and seeing that I was right, and noticing that if I had turned in the original copy (sans outline and bibliography), I would have gotten a 71 percent (107/150). Still a C, but a PASSING GRADE nonetheless. So I am quite steamed, and deflated at the same time. I really need to work on the rest of the papers now, there are four, and two are required, but I neglected to do the first one, due last Monday, the 21st, because I felt confident in my Exegesis paper grade. Now I should do all of the last three, because he'll take the highest two of the grades for those papers.
So if your reading this because you're wondering why I'm not on AIM, this is why. These next two weeks will be the worst weeks of my academic life so far. I need all the focus I can get. I won't even be listening to music, or at least trying not to anyway... but that's another story, maybe next time. Anyways, talk to you later.

Well, that was nice.

I feel better. The roller coaster of my life has come to a coasting point. I still have to make the "big decision," but I don't think it'll make that much of a difference... Of course, I probably haven't analyzed it enough yet. Basically, I have to decide between waiting for someone I've known and have seen for a long time and have grown to love, someone who I've know for a lesser amount of time, and have grown to like a lot, and someone who I haven't even met, but have spilled my guts out to like I do with the first person. I haven't even known the third girl for a year, and that's only online and just now having a two and a half hour conversation on the phone with...
So it's been rough today. I don't know who I want to pick, and yet I do kind of, but that decision won't get me anywhere, plus it will probably hurt the other two... which I don't want to do. So I'm stuck between two girls who like me, and two girls who like a different guy (yes, there are only three girls, figure it out...) One of the girls who likes another guy thinks she likes me more, and I don't think that the girl that I love who likes another guy thinks the same of me, and the third girl just likes me. A lot. How much worse can it get for a guy like me? ;-) (sarcastically speaking of course, and yet, there is some truth in humor...) So yeah. Yet another pointless post updating a small part of the world on my troubled existence.

My life is crashing down!

Yeah, pretty much. Things are happening that are extremely difficult to get my hands around, friends are getting upset, friends relatives are in the hospital, it's a mess. Short post, I know. Maybe I'll update it later, right now I need to make a phone call.

Hooray! I feel happy! (And I can see!)

I am sooo relieved! I have been wearing contacts for the past few days (if you've seen me, no, I wasn't blind) because earlier this week I had lost them. I had no idea where they were, and I was afraid that they had fallen in the trash, since it's a perfect trajectory for them to fall from my bed to the trash can. I didn't worry about it until Wednesday, when we had room inspections, because I figured that I would find them then. I didn't. This worried me, because I thought I had looked through the trash pretty well, which I did. Now today I get a refund check from the school for a loan that had extra credit on my account, and I was considering using it to buy a new pair of glasses. (The ones I lost were spares replacing the glasses that lost a lens on the Floor getaway some months earlier... another story.)

Relief washes over

Wow, do I feel better. That girl I was mentioned in my "Timing" post, my FallFest date, just checked her email tonight (finally!) and replied to my apology, saying, "Don't worry about anything. I didn't think that you were selfish at all. In fact, I thought the opposite!" Just goes to show how a second opinion can throw your mind (or at least mine) for a loop. At least I got a good introspective look at myself, and new fervor for class. God works in mysterious ways. He purposely didn't let me know about her thoughts and feelings until I had seriously considered my own actions, and saw what to improve, and then as I'm reading her email, my good friend Dori gives me an encouraging comment. Thanks Dori! And thank You, God, for making me who I am, and for desiring to make me one of your own, in the image of Your Son, Jesus. I still have a long way to go, and I'll have to travel through a lot of pain of letting go and changing some things, but it will all be for the better, in many ways. Goodnight all, I'm going to go to bed at a decent hour tonight! (that is, before midnight!)

Marine Humor

Ok, this has to be the funniest real life story I've heard in a long time, and to top it off, it's a marine! You have to hand it to them, Marine Humor is incredibly funny.

Timing...

Here's a little logic for you. See if you can follow.

Timing is everything.
God is perfect.
God's timing is perfect.

OK, it's not pure logic, there's a bit of a disconnect, but my point is: God's Perfect timing beats anything we may think. Something that made me think, and realize how well God orchestrates things in my life is a recent string of occurrences these past few days that really hit me hard. I'm not sure how to deal with them. First, Fallfest (homecoming) was this weekend, and I was a bit rude to my date, just caring more about myself than her, because she was more in tune with God and on fire for Him... I was embarrased and ashamed at how my life paled in comparison.
Then I mentioned it to an online friend I've grown to trust pretty well, and that friend pointed out my mediocrity, apathy, and complacency. This bothered me. Her strong language really shook me up and made me realize the sin of my situation. I was depending on myself and others for fulfillment, and I did not care for God's plan for me, just what was pleasing to me at the moment. Another way to summarize it would be that I was living for myself, and did things for others if I thought it would be good for me, and if I didn't deem it as beneficiary to myself, then I would do it half-heartedly or not at all (homework being one example). She brought up the story of Cain and Abel, and said that mediocrity was a sin. Then she told me to think about it some more, and I decided to write an email giving more detail.
After reading this, she pointed out my rudeness, and told me straight out that I needed to seriously adjust myself and my thinking. I've not been focused on God these past weeks, months, semester... In fact, I haven't pursued God actively for a long time, except for when I've needed something, like a good grade when I hadn't studied, or for good weather on a trip, or for food, and I haven't been doing that recently either. (no relation to my losing my ID card... another story completely) I have a history of “giving” my life to Christ, then taking it back after a while, because it's what I'm used to. I guess it would be more like showing my life to God, saying “Hey God, my life stinks right now, can you do something about it?” and then when things get better, with or without God's intervention, I say, “OK, that was nice. I'll have this back now, thanks”
Anyway, that conversation really got me thinking, “Why am I who I am? Why do I do what I do and think what I think?” Which is why I'm glad that our Biblical Foundations class is going over woldviews and hopefull going to get into how we form our own and how we should check the validity of our worldview. It's been a really interesting chain of events, I just hope I don't forget about it and revert back to my apathetic life of complacency.

Wow, I am forgetful...

I can't believe it. There were two things I was going to blog on (two seperate times), but I've forgotten them both! I certainly am everforgetful... Perhaps they'll come back to me, but by that time, the moment will have been long gone.. *sigh* Such is the curse of the procrastinator.

Humor hiding truth

There is a quote, "If you find something funny, look it over carefully for a hidden truth." I find that to be true very, very often. For example, I get a daily newsletter called "Just for Grins" which gives some jokes and a few quotes to brighten my day. Well, today, it told this anecdote:

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.

After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

If you are the oldest, as I am, I think you will quickly relate to this, as I was. I always love it when the truth is hidden in humor, because that's when it can be most effective.

Hurricanes!

Well, my experience with Hurricanes Katrina and Rita have been quite, well, let's just say they were overrated for the Longview area. For Hurricane Katrina, we had some awesome thunderstorms, and a bit of rain, not so much wind, but clouds. Our dorm (Davis Hall) also hosted about 20-50 evacuees/refugees for a night or two. Then came Rita, which was a lot windier, and a lot rainier (go figure, it was a LOT closer too, like right on top of us). We had a lot more evacuees come this time, the school opened up our small gymnasium (Belcher Gym) to hold up to a hundred, plus the empty floor in our dorm, which can hold around sixty people, I think. So we're sheltering all these people, and LeTourneau's asked students to volunteer to help staff the gym, or to donate matresses and sleeping bags and blankets and toiletries and stuff like that. People who donate matresses, sleeping bags, and blankets and stuff put their name and other info, like their room or CPO number, or their phone extension. I gave them my sleeping bag, because I figured they could put it to better use than just having it up in my closet. It's been a good week though, and I've enjoyed myself, but I guess I should finish my homework now, it's getting late.

Comments good, spam bad

OK, I've had this blog up for a year or so, maybe more, and have gotten a grand total of three, count em, one, two, three! (or maybe, 1, 10, 11, if you know your computer science...) OK, now I like comments, but they seem to be from random people, and possibly even spam, which I do not appreciate. This blog is mainly for my friends and family, and the occasional REAL stranger who stumbles upon my blog, but not for spam. I noticed that Blogger now has word verification for comments, so I think I'll activate it, sorry for the inconvenience, I just want comments from real people, not advertisements or other stuff.

College, ugh

So I've been here three weeks, and research shows that Freshmen get really tired of school around three weeks, so sending them on a required "retreat", where they can hear some motivational messages and get some sleep (yeah, right!) will revitalize them so that they can do well in the following school year. So, I just finished that, got back yesterday, and haven't done any homework, thanks to the retreat, i was so tired, I couldn't do anything Saturday afternoon/evening but watch movies, which lasted far too late (I didn't go to bed until around 1 or 2 AM, not smart), and then I had to get up for church this morning. The van left at nine, but the paper said it left at 8:30, darn.
Now I'm stuck with a bunch of homework to do, and two packages that are at the CPO, but I can't pick up till tomorrow. It's really distracting. That's it for now...
Gilligan.

Foreign aid for the US? Heck yeah!

US accepts nearly $1b in foreign aid - The Boston Globe:

Donations:

Kuwait: $400 million in oil and $100 million cash

United Arab Emirates: $100 million cash

Qatar: $100 million cash

Republic of Korea: $30 million cash and in-kind donations

Australia: $7.6 million

China: $5.1 million cash and

relief supplies

India: $5 million cash

Ireland: $1 million to Red Cross

Iraq: $1 million cash

Bangladesh: $1 million cash

Azerbaijan: $500,000 cash

Gabon: $500,000 cash

Afghanistan: $100,000 cash

Armenia: $100,000 cash

Bahamas: $50,000 cash

Maldives: $25,000 cash

Sri Lanka: $25,000 cash

Bosnia: $6,414 cash

SOURCE: US State Department

This is interesting. Up until now, I had heard that no other country had offered aid to the U.S. for the Hurricane relief efforts. Now I have been proved wrong. The process for accepting donations makes sense, going with the easier to process ones first. And I can understand the wariness of accepting Cuban doctors, regardless of their skill, who knows if Castro really has our health in mind. I'm probably being paranoid, but how easy would it be to slip 10, 20, 50 "doctors" in who will enforce the idea of euthanasia, or spread diseases that we don't have vaccines for, etc, the possibilities are numerous, and I won't go into, nor support many, if any, of them. The point is, we are recieving aid, and Bush is accepting it. just not all at once, but in a certain order. This shows wisdom, and prudence. I support Bush, he doesn't do everything right, and I think we should critique the points of our government we don't like, excercising our Right to Petition, as in the First ammendment to our Constitution.
I've said enough now, go make your own opinions, but base them on fact, not rumors or other opinions.

OK, now what?

So I'm here, at LeTourneau, Univ., and it's been two weeks or so (counting or not counting orientation) I haven't blogged for awhile... no reason I guess, just ever forgetful. I'm not sure how many people actually read my blog, since I haven't really posted much, and I've told few people. Oh well, I'm being pessimistic, and I really should work on my homework. Argh, dreaded College! I love it, and I hate it, and I'm rambling.

Holy Crap!!! an update!

So I finally found out the invoice price of my Camry vs. Corolla incident at work. $1887.93. Yikes! Not sure how I'm gonna pay that one off, seeing as I have to take all my money for college, and still save enough for next summer's van insurance, and to pay off my dad's bill. Money and cars; things I'd like to have, not to mention a J-O-B!

Ch..Ch...Check it out!

An old friend of mine, Tim Weaver, has gotten into the swing of webmastering, and has put up his own page at www.freewebs.com/giliage/you should check it out. Tell him Stephen sent ya. Oh, and make sure you sign the guestbook and check out the "wall of friends." My picture's on there somewhere!

Holy Crap!!!

I've done it again! I broke something else! This time, I hit a car at my dad's work, Jerry's Toyota. Dented the trunk of a customer's camry really badly. The bill is supposed to be around $2000. Two thousand dollars! I can't believe it! So now I'm hoping, and praying, that they will show mercy on me, and not make me pay the whole thing.

Oops! I broke something!

Well, I got my first job (at Chick-Fil-A) a while ago, and it took me about a month before I broke something. You see, I was cleaning up after close, and we were getting ready to go home, when a coworker (who shall remain unnamed) said, "I'm gonna do some pull-ups," pointing to the shelf above the kitchen door, which holds lids (in boxes). I watched as he did about three or four reps, then commented, "That's great, I bet I couldn't even do one." Not to be talked out of my own dare, (because of stupidness, pride, and wanting to show off) I jumped and pulled my self up (one!), then began to repeat, when the screws on the right side of the shelf came out of the wall! Needless to say, I fell, but landed unharmed. We spent the next 15 minutes finding tools and trying to fix it, finally giving up after putting it somewhat back together. The lid boxes are now resting on a cart in the back, and I am pending punishment/payment (I don't really know, but if what I hear about the owner is right, I'm in for something)

Hooah! A comment!

I got my first comment! Wow, do I feel stupid. The only comment I've ever gotten is from some random stranger. Thanks Nix! I'll certainly have to get blogging again.

Heritage Scholarship? I think not.

Wow, am I tired. I got back from LeTourneau U last night at 2 or 3 something in the morning, and I'm still recovering. School was a blur. I think I'll just crash at home for an hour or two, then start on my homewrok I have to make up.
Anyway, I won't know if I won a Heritage Scholarship until March 14, 2005 but I'm not too hopeful. Signing off for now, Me, myself, or I.

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