Girls are confusing, but that doesn't have to stop me from living my own life. I've decided that the key to living well is self-confidence, and that is dependent on the value of life Christ placed on us on the Cross. I think a recent conversation between a friend and I exemplifies this. (Names abbreviated to protect the innocent... My side of the conversation is in blue)
(12:08:24 PM) BC: I dont think I will ever understand women
(12:08:58 PM) SB: why do you say that?
(12:09:05 PM) BC: I dont know
(12:09:10 PM) BC: its just popped into my mind
(12:09:14 PM) SB: ah
(12:09:26 PM) SB: well, I think it's the plight of man
(12:15:06 PM) SB: I don't think we'll ever be able to think on the same wavelength as them, but I do think that we get better at reading them as we get older and grow closer to them.
(12:15:18 PM) BC: Thats the problem
(12:15:25 PM) BC: how do you grow closer to them?
(12:16:35 PM) SB: same way you grow closer to anyone. Develop a relationship by hanging out and talking a lot, and as you discuss things, you begin to see how she(they) view the world.
(12:16:58 PM) BC: It just seems different with women
(12:17:13 PM) SB: What is different?
(12:17:26 PM) BC: What Im allowed to say and what Im not
(12:17:28 PM) SB: ah
(12:17:38 PM) SB: that's part of the learning process
(12:17:55 PM) SB: I'm still struggling through it myself, of course
(12:18:09 PM) BC: of course
(12:18:31 PM) SB: But I figure if I keep my mouth shut, and think before I speak, I'm much better off
(12:18:40 PM) BC: But then I say nothing
(12:19:00 PM) SB: so?
(12:19:11 PM) BC: How can I hang out and talk it I say nothing?
(12:19:52 PM) SB: well you have to take some chances, but I would think someone like me or you would be able to keep someone's attention and just have fun
(12:20:31 PM) SB: and if you step over "the line", you'll know it, and then you can remember to be more careful something like that comes to mind
(12:20:44 PM) BC: Ok, here's where Im coming form
(12:21:09 PM) BC: At my old school, you say something wrong to a woman that your trying to become friends with, and soon all the women are mad at you, even if you dont know what you said
(12:21:32 PM) SB: ah, this is true. the community mind of girls
(12:21:43 PM) BC: then it always feel akward around the woman you said something to, and everything that has been built up disolves a bit, which makes it even harder to go back
(12:22:01 PM) SB: the key to that is self confidence
(12:22:22 PM) BC: I guess its no coincidence that my other friend said the same thing
(12:22:32 PM) SB: really?
(12:22:35 PM) BC: yeah
(12:23:21 PM) SB: I feel that if you just move past it, or ask what you said wrong, then you can apologize and move on. Unfortunately, women have a much better memory than we do.
(12:23:48 PM) BC: I dont see how they can have a better memory about how I screwed up than me
(12:24:48 PM) SB: believe me, the things that are offensive to them are more than what we consider offensive, so if their memory isn't better, it's just more specific
(12:26:14 PM) BC: ah, specific
(12:26:16 PM) BC: that sucks
(12:26:39 PM) SB: it does, until you begin to analyze what you say, like I was saying before
(12:27:12 PM) SB: and the things that offend vary by the girl, which makes it even more difficult
(12:28:43 PM)SB: but when you spend time with a few girls, you can see general trends of taboo topics and remarks, especially noting their reactions to other boys
(12:29:28 PM) BC: I'll keep my eyes open
(12:29:47 PM) SB: that's the best way
(12:29:57 PM) SB: eyes and ears open, mouth wide shut
(12:30:08 PM) SB: :-)
(12:30:10 PM) BC: sounds good to me
(12:30:38 PM) SB: of course, this could lead to "nice guy syndrome", which many men dislike
(12:31:29 PM) SB: I'm looking for a balance of boldness and wisdom, and I'm still leaning toward the quiet, reserved side
(12:34:02 PM) BC: My quiet reserved side tends to get me ignored, not even the nice guy syndeomre
(12:34:12 PM) SB: exactly
(12:34:35 PM) SB: enter: self confidence
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